The paradox of the modern world is that, amid all the apps and social platforms, we tend to feel lonelier than ever. Especially when the pressures of adult life make us feel ashamed to admit that, in reality, we don’t have as many friends as the Facebook counter says we do.
Fear not, there are millions of us in this fast-paced world who feel isolated and lonely, or did you think it was just a fluke to fill the house with plants and adopted animals?
But if human interaction is still your thing, here are some tips to improve your adult social life. It’s just a matter of putting on the mask, respecting social distancing, and stepping out of our comfort zone a bit.
Where’s everybody?
It often happens that, over time, we lose connection with important people, with friends with whom we shared moments that marked us, and who the vicissitudes of life made disappear from our environment.
Make a list, reconnect with them and invite them to a socially distanced coffee or a walk outdoors. There’s no better way to start fresh than by cleaning out the junk room.
The Queen Elizabeth Method
A friend who was lucky enough to meet Elizabeth Windsor told me with surprise that, being one of the most famous personalities in history, the Queen of England is an excellent conversationalist who puts you at ease right away. Her secret? Ask questions.
There is no better way to open up to new people than to be interested. Ask questions, get involved, and let people know they have a safe space with you.
The Art of Follow Up
Between all the “sweeping,” “follows,” and “unfollows,” we seem to have lost the sense of constancy. Friendships need, like plants, constant attention, and dedication. Keep in touch. A social media greeting is an excellent place to start.
Weekly dates and common interests help keep a relationship afloat.
Vulnerability rocks!
We know that opening up to a new person after adulthood is far from easy. A lot of water has flowed under this bridge, and our traumas seem to have morphed into a thousand-headed monster. But just as it has happened to us, it may have happened to others.
Don’t be afraid to share when you feel comfortable, and you will find the beautiful surprise that there are millions of people out there sharing with you scenarios from the past.
Much stronger… ¡juntos!
Just as Brazilian singer Roberto Carlos wished, a million friends can sing louder. Network, invite people with shared interests, and feel the love and companionship multiply.
Sports are always a good place to start, especially in a socially distanced world. But if exercising is not your thing, a book club or a group painting class can always help.
The secret is to always weave networks around shared interests and know that, although complicated, adult life doesn’t have to be lonely.