Photo courtesy of Latina Moms.
While motherhood is one of the most rewarding experiences, it is also important to recognize it is no easy feat.
We have to cope with feelings of mom guilt, depression, and anxiety, listen to unsolicited advice and learn to take care of ourselves as women and not just as mothers. We have to learn how to navigate the needs of our children while also listening to our bodies and understanding what our needs are.
When we become moms, we are exposed to many situations that we otherwise had never thought of. We spent months reading parenting books but did not know of the other difficulties we could face.
This is when we start feeling at a loss because we are unsure how to overcome these obstacles. Here are a few examples of some of the common obstacles we face as Latina moms and how to overcome them.
Patience
Moms, I get it. Sometimes motherhood kicks us down hard and has us feeling a bit on edge. Every little thing seems to set us off. We feel irritated and frustrated. This is when we have to put on our best face and manage the art of patience.
We start to feel torn because moms are supposed to embody peace, love, and compassion. This internal conflict can leave us feeling helpless as it can be difficult to have patience. After all, a normal part of being human is feeling these big emotions.
A way to learn to be more patient is to stop blaming yourself for everything. Just as you have certain days when you simply cannot seem to manage your emotions, your children feel the same. Ask yourself why they may be behaving this way so you can become more understanding and, therefore, more patient.
Generational Trauma
While our cultura Latina is beautiful, it is also one filled with generational trauma. Our parents and grandparents have passed down generations of collective trauma and negative behaviors such as machismo.
Frequently, we do not realize that we are victims of generational trauma. We believe that some behaviors are the norm and simply a regular part of our culture. However, it has become more evident that it is up to us to stop these behaviors once we identify they are wrong and should stop being passed down. Be open and honest with yourself. Have those difficult conversations with your family so that you can discuss how you feel and pave the way for your healing.
You will overcome the obstacle of generational trauma once you can openly talk about it and acknowledge it.
Balance
Finding balance during motherhood is another obstacle that is seldom talked about. We are always taught how to be mothers and how we must nurture and love our children.
While these are all important, we must learn to separate our “mom identity” from our sense of self. The problem arises when we become so absorbed in being parents that we forget to care for ourselves.
This will inevitably lead to feelings of isolation, overwhelming stress, and burnout. Practice self-care. Schedule time to prioritize yourself. You will feel more rested and happy, further strengthening your relationship with your children.
Let’s all work together to face these obstacles head-on and overcome them, si?